At the beginning of each appointment, my therapist asks, “What's on your agenda?”

I’ve been seeing the same therapist for about eight years, so there’s plenty of time to develop a routine. I treat my regular therapy sessions like a job, a workout program, or a religious service. I do what I can to maximize the efficiency and effectiveness of our sessions together, including keeping a journal before each session to help me set the agenda for each appointment.

Knowing where I want to go saves me valuable appointment time, creates a record of what issues keep coming up, and gives me a starting point for reflection and follow-up after the session. I’m going to share with you the session planning strategy that helps me organize my thoughts and maximize my time with my therapist, if only to avoid those awkward silences while trying to think of something to talk about.

So you barely have time to schedule therapy, let alone a pre-therapy planning session. I have weeks like that too. On the days I show up without an agenda, my therapist can still pull out a useful thread to move forward. But even a little bit of preparation—five to ten minutes before I log in for a video appointment—can ensure we get to what’s really bothering me.