This is a movie I’ve been putting off rewatching for years. It’s like running into an ex that you know will only bring back bad feelings. Catwoman embodies that awkward phase that comic book movies were in circa 2004, when studios were still pushing the envelope and trying to figure out the genre. They’d been trying to launch the character’s solo career since 1993, and were forced to kill the project to replace a Batman vs. Superman movie that hadn’t materialized. After multiple writers, a somewhat new director, and a lot of studio meddling, DC Comics fans were about to be served this serving of sour milk.

“It all started the day I died.”

Let’s forget everything we ever learned about Catwoman from the books, we don’t need it here. Instead of our sweet Selina Kyle, we follow Patience Phillips, a graphic designer who lets people walk all over her and tolerates way more shit than she should. Her boss ruins her work, talks down to her, and Patience’s determination to please him leads her to stumble upon a dangerous new product that could seriously harm consumers or force them to be lifelong customers. After she’s discovered, the young artist is thrown out, but luckily she previously saved a cat who comes back to breathe new life into her corpse. Now she’s tied to an Egyptian cat mythology and has superhuman athletic abilities – and has somehow also become a pretty good thief – all so she can get revenge on those who murdered her and protect others, but can she do it while also dating a sexy new cop boyfriend?

The lore in this movie annoys me in the dumbest of ways because it focuses so much on the "cat" aspect of the character and decides to give her not only powers but a second personality where the main character doesn't always seem to be in control or forgets that she's done specific things. It's not explored enough to be meaningful and is too prevalent to ignore, along with other cat-like behavior. She drinks pure milk at the club, is obsessed with catnip, hisses at dogs, hates getting wet, and eats sushi the same way my wife does, but her worst offense is the cat puns. I'd like to ask if, since she does everything like a cat, she also makes love like one, but we see her boyfriend's back after the sex scene. Catwoman uses a whip for a variety of reasons, one of which is because it mimics a tail to complete the animalistic aesthetic, but with the way this movie treats its main character, I'm shocked they didn't just have her say that out loud for the audience.